Pin It
Powered By:
Android Advice
The Solo Traveler Blog

“Baby Please Don’t Go”: how to tell your partner you want to travel solo.

Your partner may be thinking “who will I lean on?” and “who will drink the other cup of coffee?”.

“You’re going where? When? Alone?

What about me?”

Do you get the sense that your partner is thinking: “Baby, please don’t go.”?

Yes, this post was inspired when I heard this classic blues tune. (A great video of it sung by John Lee Hooker and Van Morrison is below.)

And I thought, this is an important topic. People who see the real benefits of solo travel may be with someone who doesn’t. And they will likely want to travel alone whether they’re part of a couple or not.

So, what’s the challenge? To travel solo and maintain the relationship as well. So I give you…

9 tips for partners who want to travel solo.

  • Don’t travel solo to run away from a deteriorating relationship.
  • Do travel solo to enrich your life as well as your relationship.
  • Don’t spring the idea of traveling solo on an unsuspecting partner. Muse about taking time on your own well in advance. Talk about taking a few hours or a day to yourself. Talk about the idea that maybe someday you’ll want to travel on your own.
  • Explain why you want to go away. This may be about having the time to write or draw or explore things that do not interest your partner. Or it may simply be that you enjoy exploring local cultures and it is always easier when alone.
  • Be clear about your departure and return times.
  • Work out with your partner exactly how often and by what means you will communicate when you’re away.
  • Share your itinerary including hotels and dates with your partner and keep them informed of changes to your plan.
  • Don’t document everything, every minute and share it with your partner. Don’t be concerned about every detail that is going on at home. Really travel solo.
  • On your return be as interested in what’s happened in your partner’s life as you are enthusiastic about what you’ve experienced while traveling solo.

And now, John Lee Hooker and Van Morrison singing “Baby Please Don’t Go”…

Related posts:

  • http://solotravelerblog.com Janice Waugh

    Hi Rhoda,
    I know what you mean but the right person will respect your need to travel solo.

    Cheers,
    janice

  • Rhoda

    I love travelling solo. Prefer it to travelling with partners or friends. Its so much more enriching. I don’t have a partner right now, but my fear has always been that I might end up being with someone who will cramp my style.

  • http://www.boomeresque.com/ Just One Boomer (Suzanne)

    Most of our travel is funded by tacking it onto my husband’s work trips. This enables me to have significant time on my own during our travels while he attends conferences or has meetings or speaking engagements.  I use that time to see things that don’t particularly interest him and to sometimes spend time with people who I don’t think would hold his interest for that long. Actually, even when we’re together, we sometimes split up so we can see things at our own pace. When I visit a museum, I like to read everything whereas he has more of a skimming style.  We just make up a time and place to meet. I have also done some solo trips.  It helps to have achieved empty nester status because it’s much more of an imposition to leave a significant other with responsibility for a job AND sole responsibility for a couple of children. 

  • Claire, England

    Hi Tracy, I have always wanted to travel and my partner does not. I have come up with the solution of going away for a month next year to Central America, but reading your idea, I think it is fantastic! I am able to get a year off at my work, and doing it like you have done would suit us both.  I suppose the only downside will be the cost of lots more flights. Definitely something to think about though, thank you.  Claire, UK.

  • http://www.tourvey.com/webevaluation.php website evaluation

    I never tried to travel solo I always travel with my friends. It looks that now it is the time to travel solo.

  • http://solotravelerblog.com Janice Waugh

    Fantastic Sarah. It’s wonderful to read yours and others stories.

  • http://solotravelerblog.com Janice Waugh

    Lovely to hear how you negotiated a career break, lots of travel and maintaining your relationship. Fantastic!

  • Sarah

    I’ve been married for a little over 2 years and in January took a month long solo trip to Africa. We talked about it ahead of time, negotiated budget and overall my husband was very supportive :)
    We’re taking a trip together this December and then I’ll start planning another solo trip for 2013. I think we’ve worked out a compromise that works for both of us.

  • http://www.suitcasescholar.com/ Tracy Antonioli

    I’m married–and own a home–and have been traveling solo at least once per month for the past year during a year-long career break.  We talked about it before we even began saving for the year–two years ago–and negotiated how long I’d be gone and how often.  So I’d add that to the list too–include your partner in the planning process.  He agreed that as long as I was here twice as much as I was away (so gone for two weeks home for three etc.) he was ok with it.  Different people will come up with different rules but still–it’s important to talk about what you both want and need.  

  • http://profiles.google.com/elal.lasola Elal Jane Lasola

    I’ve tried telling my bf I’m going away once, he was flustered I didn’t tell him about it but I explained and he eventually understood. It was one great experience, I feel I have all my time to just go and wander.

About Janice Waugh and Tracey Nesbitt

I'm an author, blogger, speaker and traveler. I became a widow and empty-nester at about the same time. And then, I became Solo Traveler... Here's the full story. >>

Tracey Nesbitt I’m a writer, editor, food and wine fanatic, and traveler. On my very first trip abroad I learned that solo travel was for me. Here's the full story. >>

Get the Solo Traveler Newsletter…

Subscribe Now!

Sign up for the monthly Solo Traveler Newsletter and get the monthly Deals Advisory as well PLUS a free copy of "Travel Views: 9 Travel Stories by 9 Travel Bloggers.

As Seen In…

2nd edition of The Solo Traveler’s Handbook

The 2nd edition of The Solo Traveler's Handbook is part of The Traveler's Handbook series. Click on the book and check them all out on Amazon. Also available in iTunes, Barnes & Noble, Chapters/Indigo and more.

Follow Solo Traveler

Archives

RESULTS MAY VARY (The disclaimer.)

The content of Solo Traveler and any resources published by Solo Traveler are meant for entertainment and inspiration only. Every person and every travel situation is different. Your safety, satisfaction and fun traveling solo are your responsibility alone and not that of Solo Traveler, its publisher, editor and/or writers.